Must we really have to end it this way becos of what i say. I am very angry with u no doubt, but when i too angry, i tend to lose my temper nor my mind, saying hurtful things to u. I know i'm in the wrong but does that costs me a death sentence by u? I dun think so. And what did u do throughout the conversation? U just keep quiet and say nothing, as if i 'm talking to the wall...
I never know that becos of this, we can quarrel so much. Say u cant promise me on anything anymore.I dunno what u eanr. I just feel that we have drift apart alot till we dun even realise it. Now that u feel that, does it means is the end of us? Does it means that we cant do anything but to let it end?
U msg me just now and from ur msg, i feel that u are still yet to cool down and instead very angry and pissed at my words. Call u no answer... I guess i cant even have a chance to explain to u what my msg actually means instead of wat u think... I just dun want to disturb u then. Perhaps both of us should cool down... Perhaps...
Just read betsy blog, have a quiz and i took it and i guess the analysis is really true to my moods now here is what it says:
At this time you are feeling 'uptight' and you are urgently in need of rest and relaxation; but perhaps even more than that you need to overcome that feeling that you have been 'hard done by' and treated with a complete lack of consideration. Maybe you have, but whatever may have been the cause of your inherent anxiety, you regard the situation as intolerable. You are, however, sufficiently competent to turn that situation around - you have overcome similar problems in the past, and really this one isn't too different.
You seem to lack the energy of late to get up and go. Your objectives appear to be unattainable and no one seems to care. You feel lost, neglected and need some W.T.C. (Warm tender care).
At times one is burdened with more than one's fair share of problems and this would appear to be your situation at present. But you are adamant - you know what you wish to achieve - and by giving a little and taking a little you may well find that the realization of your dreams could become a reality.
You are experiencing extreme frustration at this point of time, trying to achieve security and peace of mind, but whatever you seem to do doesn't effect the situation. You are worn out and your energy is being seriously depleted. You may be experiencing what is known as 'heartache' - both mentally and physically. You are a listener and you listen and respond to everything that is going on around you. You feel that all that life has to offer should be within your grasp and you would like to participate in every part of it but the situation is such that every door seems to be closed to you. You just can't understand why that is. But it is - and what's more you feel powerless to change it.
You are completely worn out and you are not in the mood for any further demands on your resources. The situation - such as it is - has rendered you quite helpless, unable to continue the mental battle that you have been pursuing for some considerable time. Enough is enough. All you would like to do now would be to have some time for yourself, to find a peaceful situation where you can recuperate in your own time.
This above is before writing this blog. The one below is after writing, see the difference? And it still means the bad side of life i'm facing.
Enough is enough - you feel frustrated and rejected. You are fighting back and the going is tough. It would be just wonderful if you could be left in peace.
You are feeling very vulnerable at this time. Nothing seems to be going in the right direction - business wise, private-life wise, everything. You need some emotional security and an environment which could possibly provide fewer problems, but the way you are feeling you can't be bothered even to make the effort.
You feel tired - worn out and listless. The last thing that you want to do is to be in an open conflict with those around you that are forever tormenting you. What to do? That's the rub. You are feeling that you are being choked - unable to breathe.
Nobody seems to understand you at this moment for everything you suggest or do seems to be taken up the wrong way. All of this misunderstanding is leading to anxiety and stress. The situation naturally is not as you would like it to be - you feel that you are being treated most unfairly and that trust, affection and understanding are being withheld from you and that you are being treated with a demeaning lack of consideration. You consider yourself being denied the appreciation essential to your well being and self-esteem and that there is nothing you can do about it. You feel that whatever you try to do to change the situation, you are getting nowhere fast. You would really like to get away from it all but can't find the energy or the strength of mind to make the necessary decision.
The tensions induced by trying to cope with conditions which are beyond your capabilities, or your reserves of strength, have led to considerable anxiety and a sense of personal inadequacy. Your inability to take control of the situation causes you to over-react in stubborn defiance blaming everyone but yourself for your own failures.
All i want to do now, is to keep myself and occupied as i dun want to break down in the office. is not the last thing that i would be doing...
